Welcome to this Room 11 blog. Our learning philosophy is to LEARN, CREATE an artifact that shows our learning, and then SHARE it in creative ways, including posting it here on this blog.The purpose of this blog is for students to become accustomed to sharing their learning, recieving feedback, and preparing them for having their very own blog.While students will make every effort to have work corrected and error free it is in fact authentic student work, showing where students are at, and so there are likely to be some mistakes. The aim is to note progress and improvement, and we expect to see this over time.

Monday, 29 July 2013

The big shake

Hi my name is Ioana and I am going to tell you about the 6.5 magnitude earthquake that had happened in central wellington at 5:09.

On Sunday the 20th I was at home we had people stay over because it was my dad’s birthday party. We were all relaxing until………….   a 6.5 magnitude earthquake hit central wellington at 5:09.

Everything started to move we all ran outside I felt like I was on a boat the lights started shaking the doors were rattling painting fell over I was really scared the trees were shaking side to side. Then I realized it was an  earthquake that was the first  time I ever experiment an earthquake it was really strong. My 2 cozens were really scared but the good thing it only lasted up to 20 seconds.

Everybody was safe and sound we all got prepared for  another big shake but only one single painting fell down  some were  a bit crocked but no body got hurt which was good I was really frightened by it that another would not happen and the holidays would go back to normal.
Thank you for reading my story on earthquakes if you have experiment a bad earthquake before well I hoped you have enjoyed this story about it. 
By Ioana

  
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2 comments:

  1. Mr Corlett29 July 2013 at 20:54

    Dear Ioana,
    I liked the way you introduced your story - it was quite effective as a personal account of your experience.
    How well do you think you went with your focus - punctuation.
    Did you check it carefully. For instance ... in this bit you wrote "Thank you for reading my story on earthquakes if you have experiment a bad earthquake before well I hoped you have enjoyed this story about it." Can you see where you need more full stops?

    I liked your paragraphing.

    Mr Corlett

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  2. Anonymous30 July 2013 at 16:47

    It was scary, wasn't it?

    I liked how you talked about the trees shaking side to side.
    It was good paragraphing too.

    But also remember about punctuation and full stops.
    Also remember to check it like "Cozens" is "Cousins".

    It was a really interesting story!

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