Room 6.
Waikanae School.
Seddon St.
Waikanae.
New Zealand.
4-12/9/2013.
Dear Room 17,
Hi I am Nicolas and I am conor
we are writing this letter to remind you to save Electricity. waikanae school can save more electricity
so that we can get more sports equipment.
We did a survey on power and you left your lights, the sound system, and the projector on.
we want you to turn your lights, your sound system, and your projector off.
It will help the school save power.
Thank you for saving power.-_-
Dear Nicholas and Conor. You have some good evidence to back up that they left lights on with your photos. However I think you still need to work on your proof reading. Conor, your name is a proper noun and MUST start with a capital letter. There are also missing full stops and capital letters. Have a go at fixing them. You also need to add some more convincing arguments. Where is your persuasive language. Check the chart on the board for ideas.
ReplyDeleteRegards,
Mr Corlett